Over and Above all

There are so many things, events, actions we see around which are over and above the intentions for which they are done or carried out. These things are somehow triggered by one's own values or is done to satisfy the heap of society expectations. There are many unwritten rules and guidelines which are to unnecessarily followed just for the sake of itz been done in the same way from ages ago. And since nobody dares breaching the established law we ends up mere puppets acting as per their modulations. And now the hold is so grave that we just can't let it go. It needs ample of spirit and fearlessness and sorry to say we are still slaves of "Log Kya Kahenge...."

One of the examples of such an event which we are fond of is - Marriage. Forget about the cruel cases of dowry or where are women considered dust of a male's feet. Lets talk about a decent indian wedding. Yeah, decent still exists and in aam-aadmi's established and recognized protocol it means - Searching for a family which doesn't demand - car, cash, house, gold, 3* wedding venue, caterers of their choice, who are educated and let their daughter work etc etc. So, a decent shaadi constitues (Bride-side version) - some gold for your daughter, gifts for groom, his family & extended families, renting a fancy hall for the shaadi (since they have not explicitly asked for it but who doesn't want), gold ornaments for parents of groom (again, they have not asked for it), small car lets say an alto, wagaon R (after all.....they didn't demand), enough cash to display (same reason as above), gifts for there own family & extended family (after all, they will be giving something for Kanyadaan), sangeet night in not-so-fancy-hall etc etc. And at the end they shield it behind "We are the lucky that they didn't demand anything. But that doesn't mean we do not do anything to maintain their honor. Every one expects, who doesn't. What if they would have asked for something at the last moment. We didn't give them any scope to complain or demand. Daamad ji is engineer after all. He chose our daughter in spite of attractive dowry packages offered."

I am a Rajasthani and has been a spectator to all listed above. Honestly speaking, before it all started in my family i too enjoyed going in marriages, loading myself with tons of calories, tasting and throwing away - of course being a guest itz my birth right. If not an active participant of bad-mouth group, i would't mind listening to that. Now being a part of the system or lets put it this way that now when it has come to my family funds i am awakening to a new "Real world" coming with a cost of several bylaws at a discounted rate. What to do, how to do, when to do is considered daily, in the background of it's agreement with :

The choice of Groom's family

Standards of society

and what are their own choices, forgotten some where or are lost enough to make any.

I, by default, become a part and parcel of such frequent instances. When subjected to it, I do not surrender by merely listening and waiting for a new showbiz of the biggest social drama. Though, i have come to a pact with the fact that even if i scream or threaten them to run away, this glossy sequence will go at its own pace. Helpless but won't spare an effort against it. In a rush to get everything perfect for those, attending for the sake of relishing a lavish dinner for free and dancing at the tunes of band, two angelic-innocent faces are buried who just look around with confusion albeit meekly smiling at times reminding themselves that "Itz their Day".