Mann…

Ek ansuljha sa ehsaas

Apna ho k b jo apna sa na lage

Lakon ki bheed chod akele vicharta rahe kahi dur

Bhramit ho chhalta fire yun he

Sukhe patte sa udta rahe khwabon k galiyare mein

Kabhi darakht sa rahe tatasthath

Falaye apni baahein samet le har lamhe ko purani jado sa

Fir taumar upahaar de us jhalak ka badalo se jhakti dhup sa

Tez hawa ki gati sa na ruke na sune

Bandh k kub 1 jagah tike

Lg jaye jo kisi se na puchiye haal

Chain cheene neendein kre bekar

Isi ki tarah ho pati mein b

Swachand…natkhat…azad

A new step

Making my way in the crowd of millions minds, I sheepishly come at the door. Anxious to breathe in a new life, trying to desert all that which holds me back…Emotions revive and heart comes alive…colorless face attempts 2 get a glimpse of outside. “What will it look like ??” rules over the sharp pain which engulfs body…longing rises and so do the faith…

Shades of time come again and again…warns, scares and push me back…

Colors, Bright Is what I see…Dark, Grey is what eyes do…

Violent blow I receive and steps out unknowingly. Flow is hard and cruel. I lose my balance and come on knees. Heart pumps fast and mind scolds. Yet the vision of colors is not lost. I look up, a drop falls, touches and pale turns into glow. The Healing heat cures the marks, while shine embraces to imbibe its bit in me.

I cry…I scream….

I walk over all the grey, the blue and the black to welcome the pink and the red. “A new step” as I just call it illuminates reach of my eyes..

Hold your spirit high, vision focused, move out of cocoons, become one with the triumphant energy…

After all…It matters

I am sure we all have (the writer as well readers) been through romantic phases in our lives. Ahhhh….the moment I recall those days, a fresh young smile illuminate my dull and sleepy face (obvious after a study about TAXES). If wonder if romance can make me forget my surroundings for a moment at workplace, the students sitting at back benches are no culprits…its just cupid.

I am remineded of SRK movies wherein the girl used to get wholehearted attention of the most desirable man on this planet (Yes, definitly SRK…and I was not wrong being in his fan faollowing list). In fact it would not be wrong to say that I was introduced to Romance by SRK, thanx to our frquent visits to jaipur which made it possible for me to watch him on big screen. Watching such movies was followed by day dreaming and endless fantasicing about me replacing the girl.

Getting little more grown up, classroom romance sparkled our lives. Exchanging seats to get a glance of our “supposedly love” was a routiene, if answered with a smile was followed by making reservations for the “seat next to her”. Saving her lunch from the rest just to make sure he takes the first bite was the small karvachauth ritual followed by the students. Picnic announcements used to top the wish lists of such “couples” after all he had a right to see her in his favourite colred dress. While guys engaged in doing heroic deeds of approaching the girl with chocolate, the girl used to act indiffrent initially when in her girlie group, later explaining him “sub k saamne accha nhi lgta. Unhe pata chal gya to sub ko bata dengi”

Freedom from school dress, regularised study hours and more liberty and time for this unavoidable emotion was granted by college. Looking for cheap calling plans, Free msgs, evening walks, frequent imaginery B’day parties (some how friend increased many folds) were the common methods of chatting and dating. Roaming in college garden, ears plugged in and whistling, considering it to be cool was again a sign of “dil ki beemari”. 

I garciously thank cafes, fast food centres and isolated benches of gardens which became a witness to life long vows, caring instructions like “pahunchte he phone krna” and honey dipped warnings “Tum nhi kahoge to mein b nhi khaungi”….

I admit that the feel of flying butterflies have kept me awoke thinking about the coming date… it has left me mesmerized at the surprise love notes….Bike rides were never so cherishing….Walking hand in hand became a fascination…pillows got wet on a small tiff and early mornings calls gave days a kick…

Rain added fuel to the missing sessions sitting window side while a group of besties maturely guides…

Though today romance has taken a backstep in my life but the feel is always alive within me…

After all, It Matters

Moments turn short, impact gets profound

Don’t search for it its within found….