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Saturday 28 February 2015

I'll take care next time, mummy ji

The title is certainly not the line i would say to my mom. Definitely not. After all, moms are doting in spite of suffering all the calamities we create knowingly. Moms are just so different. But i fail to understand the immense change which comes along with words "in-law". Yes, the nasty creature, nightmare of almost every bride to be --- Mother-in-law. She claims herself to be a mother & at the same time make sure that you realize the difference of being in "sasural" with her every taunt she innocently hits at you. While, we the freshers in the game can only manage a week smile in response. I didn't  understand as to why girls detest their MIL till i face the trauma of being with her in the absence of my poor better half (poor soul, i pity him for being too much love in with both the ladies).

The whole incident, what do i feel about it, how do my MIL feel it is & the perspective of the extended family (yeah, they should come first when its between MIL & DIL) would require me to write a book with a new edition releasing in every 6 months. However, i bravely take the allegation on my head to point out some of the peculiar features you can expect out of a MIL. Here it goes :

1. She leaves nothing undone to share her accomplishments about how well she managed her big family, what not she has done to keep the bonding alive, how happily she gave up all her hobbies & pleasures to make a family & etc etc. Wouldn't these pearls of wisdom work better as a speech by Nirupa Roy had she received a Lifetime achievement award.  

2. The child-like harmlessness she has while smacking you hard with her razor-sharp comments leaves you weak in knees in a gathering. Knowingly or unknowingly, you could annoy her at any unearthly hour at the drop of a hat. 

3. Trust me, "Palla" is something as debatable and controversial as Delhi residents receiving free water, electricity & WiFi. I wonder if our esteemed composers ever thought of this before writing "tera Pallu sarka jaye re, pallu latke gori ka pallu latke....." when the first thing any MIL would want is not even an inch moving palla. I regret the interrupted views of our gasping husbands for the backless cholis.

4. How difficult it would be to keep aside the happy moments, jokes & laughter you both shared & just taking down the negatives the careless girl has. Grumbling at every care free moment she enjoyed assuming it be her "own home" is not an easy task. Well, you really did some home work, mummy ji.

5. Do you really have an idea of how to fulfill the double rounds of expectations while attempting to save your own identity. Firstly, of your caring son who would love to persistently try  to show he has got the best suitable girl for the family. Secondly, comes you with an attached string of your social circle (whose expectations is definitely yours). While, the girl tries to breath & unfailingly asks herself "Who am I ?" Believe me or not, but you are possibly making a future MIL one of your kind. Period.

Some significant part of the untold story which i went through fortunately at an early stage of my marriage where people mostly tries to be friendly & loving to each other. If ever ask what all does it take to be a good DIL, i will reply "Sanity". Yes, it leaves you frustrated cringing for a dose of compassion which will always be absent at the moment. Whatsoever be it, I wont give up on the fact that some relations need more of time & space to get going & I am certainly not a fairy with a magic wand. And i couldn't agree more to the fact that yes, it do take away the warmth of the new knot tied but lets see how long does it takes to fill the gap. 




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